Always seem to be starting over...

I don't even know how many times I've started over this year alone. Probably around five. I guess that's good in a way - I fall off the horse, I eventually get back on. I just want to stop falling off already. Seriously, enough is enough!

I was going to go for a run today, and mentally I was really feeling it, but after last night's atrocious run, I decided a little bit of rest wouldn't kill me. The plan is to wake up and run tomorrow morning before it becomes too hot out, shower, head to the beach with my lovely sister (lathered in SPF 50), relax at home, and then meet up with an old friend. This is the plan. I'm hoping to do a 1.0 mi warm up, some interval training, and a 1.0 mile cool down. We'll see how that goes!

I also weighed myself this afternoon. Granted it was midday and I'd had about 4 cups of water and eaten two meals, but I'm just going to accept that as my weight. It's probably fairly accurate, and I'm terrible at remembering to weight myself first thing in the morning. I am currently 209.8 lbs. Heavier than I'd like, but hey, look on the bright side! It's still 12.2 lbs less than when I started, right? I'm going to keep telling myself that. My goal is to be under 200 lbs by my 21st birthday (June 20th). I think 10 lbs in a month is a fairly reasonable goal... gotta stop eating those brownies, though ;)

Bad Day... again!

So today I set out for the gym with high hopes. I hadn't run in a week and a day, so clearly I should be able to make up for what I'd missed, right? Wrong. Oh-so-very wrong. I was running for about 4:00 when I wanted to call it quits. I was breathing more heavily than usual, my muscles were already tired, and I was getting multiple stitches. I kept going until I got to 6:00 (~0.5 miles) and then decided to see if I could walk it off. After 8:00 walking, I still had vestiges of pain, but I couldn't stop after just 0.5 miles running. I don't think I've run so poorly since I started running again in January. WOMP.

After the 8:00 walk I decided to get myself up to at least 1.0 miles by doing some 1:30 run x 1:00 walk intervals. I did that until I finished up the mile, and then pushed myself to run and additional 4:00, totalling ~ 1.33 miles. Not so bad. Not great at all. Far from great, in fact. But I pushed myself to go further, and that's what matters. Looks like I'm starting over. Again!

And so it begins

So here I am for all the world to see. I've been ~60 pounds overweight, for, well, just about ever. I can't remember ever being thin, probably because I never was. I wasn't brought up in a very healthy lifestyle (though I do not fault my mother), and now that I'm out on my own, I haven't made any lasting changes. Last summer I lost 20 pounds through eating right and exercising, but once I got busy, I neglected myself. I now find my 5'6" self at a whopping 222 pounds. That's crazy! I'm only 20 years old, and in my opinion, I shouldn't have to be restricted in my life choices because of my size. So I'm putting my foot down (one after another) and making the changes myself. There's no one else to make them, after all.

So yeah, I tried the couch to 5k program, and while it's great and all (I made it to week 7/9), I didn't like its structure. I ended up adapting it to my needs, which turned out to be great; after I made the necessary alternations, I was able to complete the newly renovated program and consistently ran 20-30 minutes 4 or 5 days a week. Sadly, I didn't enter a road race while the weather was favorable. Even more saddening is that once my semester got to be too hectic, I really began to neglect my running. And by 'neglect' I mean to say that I abandoned it. My poor running shoes, how sad and lonely they must have felt. Anyway, I've started running again, I'm gradually making changes to my eating habits, and my goal for the month of December is to lose 8 pounds and to be able to run 1.5 miles at a time. That would bring me down to 214 and halfway to the running abilities that I had this past summer. Let's see how that goes!

As for the name of the blog, it's a play on a Steve Prefontaine quote: "A lot of people run a race to see who's the fastest. I run to see who has the most guts." Hopefully, I'll be able to show that yes, I've got what it takes, I'm willing to push myself and challenge myself, and I will achieve my goals. Also, at 222 pounds, I clearly have a gut ;)